Go To Tartarus
by VeryDazzlingMuggle
Summary: "… was a common demigod phrase. But after what Percy and Annabeth went through together, it became quite a touchy subject." Or, the evolution of a certain phrase for a certain couple. Percabeth. One-shot.


_Summary: "… was a common demigod phrase. But after what Percy and Annabeth went through together, it became quite a touchy subject." Or, the evolution of a certain phrase for a certain couple. Percabeth. One-shot._

* * *

 **Go to Tartarus**

For a place so comparable to hell, demigods sure did use the word Tartarus often.

The most common use was ' _Go to Tartarus_ ,' the demigods' equivalent to 'go to hell'. Friends used it flippantly and teasingly, not really understanding how horrible the suggestion really was. Enemies especially used the phrase often, but no one _really_ processed what it meant. No one questioned it.

The first time Annabeth heard the phrase, she'd been seven years old. She'd only arrived at Camp Half-Blood a few weeks earlier, and had only just become accustomed to the somehow both chaotic and scheduled life of the demigod Camp.

She was the youngest child of Athena - in fact, she was the youngest demigod in the whole camp. This came with some perks. Everyone was always nice to her (excluding a specific few sour demigods), because no one could really deny anything from the bright-eyed, blond little girl who had just lost her big sister figure, Thalia Grace.

Everyone knew of the story of how Annabeth arrived at Camp Half-Blood. Not only was it surprising that such a young half-blood had needed to run away from home, but the fact that she had traveled with a daughter of Zeus? That was shocking to many - pun not intended. Annabeth and Luke had been bombarded with questions from all the campers - that is, once everyone got accustomed to them being there.

After all the questions Annabeth had answered about their time on the run - about having to wait outside of supermarkets and pretend to be a happy little girl looking for donations for her older brother's Boy Scout Pack, or the nights spent in alleys, or the time running from the police or monster (or even sometimes both) - she was surprised when everyone still treated her like a little kid. Sure, she was young, but hadn't she _just_ finished telling them about how she and Thalia had to fight off a homeless gang one night when Luke was gone rummaging for food? How could they possibly still think she was even remotely innocent? However, Annabeth had to admit that it was nice to not be blamed for _everything_ like she had been at her father's house.

Luckily, Annabeth wasn't completely stripped of her innocence (Thalia and Luke had at least _tried_ to be somewhat good role models for the little girl). Still, Annabeth wasn't as ignorant and clueless as everyone assumed, and Luke was still too busy moping around about Thalia to bother in correcting everyone. The fact was, Annabeth was smart. She had a thirst for knowledge. And she worked hard to _earn_ the right to learn. She knew about bad stuff. She had experienced bad stuff first hand. And, yeah, Annabeth was still kinda shy around everyone at camp, but it _always_ made her smile when someone would be about to say something not-so-kid-friendly, but then stop and look toward her with wide eyes. It was funny to watch them stutter awkwardly before turning away from her big, bright, innocent eyes (and - okay - maybe she did play it up a little to seem sweeter, but boy, the looks on their faces were _priceless_ ).

The first slip someone made was pretty minor - during canoeing practice an older camper shrieked shrieked 'Holy Hera!' when a nymph popped up out of the water suddenly, but Annabeth barely noticed, plus she didn't care. And since she didn't say anything, everyone had just assumed - and hoped - she hadn't even heard.

Eventually, though, someone was bound to slip up - _big_ _time_. The occasion occurred one night in the Athena Cabin. Everyone was getting ready for 10:00 curfew, the daughters and sons of Athena rushing around like crazy to get ready for lights out. Annabeth, of course, was already waiting on her bunk. Her teeth were brushed, her hair was in two braids ( _yes,_ her hair was already curly, but at least it put some uniformity to her messy mane; plus, when one of her siblings brushed her hair for her, it reminded her of Thalia - and that made everything better), and she was sitting criss-cross-apple-sauce on her neatly made bed.

You might think the daughter of Athena was bored, but it was quite the opposite. Annabeth loved watching her siblings. Not only did it let her notice things, but it was fun to watch the usually put together, studious children of Athena talk and chat excitedly, running around the cabin with various items of clothing flying over her heads. It felt like some sort of secret - everyone else in the camp thought they were just smart and quiet, sometimes aloof, and preferred to read books than attempt any socializing. While it was true all children of Athena enjoyed a good book (Maggie sitting and reading on her bunk as it bounced up and down from the weight of a jumping, squealing Jen was an example of the Athenian demigods' ability to become engrossed in literature), that didn't mean they were void of emotion.

 _If only the rest of camp could see us now_ , Annabeth thought as she watched Maggie get smacked in the back of the head with a pillow before brushing the hair out of her eyes and returning to her book.

When Thea, Annabeth's big sister and head counselor of Athena Cabin, saw her waiting patiently on her bed, watching everyone with wide eyes, she smiled. "Hey," she greeted Annabeth as she ducked under the top bunk of the bed and settled in next to Annabeth. "You ready?"

Smiling, Annabeth nodded.

Thea poked her in the side, widening the young girl's grin successfully. "I wish all our brothers and sisters were as efficient as you," she praised.

Annabeth's eyes brightened. "I like watching everyone get ready," she told her older sister softly.

"You notice a lot when you do that, don't you?" Thea asked the young girl, and she nodded. Before Annabeth could answer, however, a couple voices started raising over near the door.

Heather and Benedict's voices were successfully being heard above the din of everyone else's voices. Annabeth watched as fourteen year old Benedict, who was taller than Heather by a significant amount, hold a thick blue book above her reach. It didn't help that he was standing on one of the beds, dangling the novel just a few inches out of reach of his sister. Twelve year old Heather, her hair unbrushed and cheeks flushed, reached up with a scowl.

"Ben!" she shrieked, and Maggie covered her ears with a wince as she put down her book. Benedict and Heather had gotten the attention of the whole cabin, if not the whole camp. Even Jen had stopped jumping on the bed.

"Give it back!" Heather ordered with a huff as she lowered her arms, realizing there was no use in trying to physically take the book.

"I'm not letting you borrow it after what you did to my other one!" Benedict responded adamantly. "Do you know how long it took for me to get that jelly stain off the cover? You shouldn't be allowed to bring books to the Mess Hall!"

Heather scowled. "I see you eating there with books all the time!"

"That's because I have the self-control not to spill my breakfast all over them!" Benedict snapped angrily.

"Enough." Thea's calm, stern voice broke in as Heather opened her mouth to respond. No one had noticed since they were so interested in the fight, but the head counselor had quickly walked over to Benedict and Heather. She waved a hand at the rest of the cabin, telling them, "Keep on getting ready. Lights out in ten minutes." As everyone started bustling around again, Thea turned to Heather and Benedict. She grabbed the book out of Benedict's hands easily, ordering him to get down from the bed. She looked at the book.

"Why are you arguing about _Little Women_?" she asked. Annabeth, within listening distance, watched as her older sister narrowed her grey eyes.

Neither Ben nor Heather looked at all remorseful. "Ben said I could borrow his copy when I was done with _The Hunger Games_!" Heather piped up first, her lips pouted. "And _now_ he says I can't."

"That's because you always ruin my other books!" Benedict snapped. "You expect me to let you borrow and damage my books without any consequences? Why can't you borrow someone _else_ 's?"

Heather opened her mouth to respond, but Thea held up a hand to silence her. "You both are getting way to upset over a little thing," she reprimanded. "What is our policy in Athena Cabin?"

Benedict sulked for a second before he sighed and responded, "Books are there to exchange and share, and to show that you very much care." Annabeth smiled as he said it, even though Benedict was doing the opposite. She loved that rule. Even though she didn't have any books of her own when she came to Camp, her brothers and sisters were happy to lend them to her, and sometimes they even let her keep the book if they had an additional copy.

Right now Benedict didn't seem to like the rule so much.

Heather held out her hand smugly, but Thea turned her gaze on her younger sister. "Heather, you _know_ you shouldn't damage other people's property. Now, I will only let you borrow Ben's book if you promise to take care of it. Can you do that?" Heather nodded solemnly, her face still dark. "Good." She was handed the book. "You're still going to be punished, though. You're banned from reading during free period for a week."

Thea walked away towards the bathroom, and Annabeth watched as Heather's face fell. She felt a spark of sympathy for her older sister. Being banned from reading during free time was horrible - free time was the _only_ time to read, and now she wouldn't be allowed to devour the words of Louisa May Alcott for another week.

"Told you shouldn't eat with books around," Ben told Heather smugly, his voice low.

This finally broke Heather, whose face suddenly turned bright red. "Go to Tartarus!" she snapped loudly, turning on her heel. She didn't even realize Annabeth was in the next bunk over, watching the entire thing. As soon as she said it, the entire cabin quieted for a second, staring.

Heather continued over to her bed like nothing had happened, but Annabeth saw her shooting both Thea and herself worried glances.

Annabeth smiled to herself as the lights went out later. And to think, everyone had thought she was innocent.

As if 'Go to Tartarus' wasn't Thalia's battle cry nearly every time they had fought.

* * *

Annabeth maintained her goody-two-shoes reputation for another three years. By then, she wasn't the youngest in camp anymore, she'd made a couple friends, and she was a lot - a _lot_ more comfortable.

On one occasion, she told Clarisse to go to Tartarus, and even though the daughter of Ares just scoffed and walked away, Annabeth knew that everyone - especially Clarisse - had been surprised at her words.

Soon, although Annabeth was still known as strong, smart, curious, and a good camper in general, to her siblings, friends, and enemies, she had a bit of a dirty mouth at times. Who could exactly blame her, though? She'd grown up with people _years_ older than her. And, as long as Annabeth held her tongue when little kids or adults were around, no one could really criticize.

Percy was the first to actually ask her about it.

"What are all those phrases you say?" He asked her one day with wide eyes. She raised an eyebrow at him.

"I mean, I _know_ they're different versions of bad words," the son of Poseidon said quickly, his green eyes darting back and forth. For a moment, the sea-green irises temporarily distracted Annabeth before she snapped herself back to the present to pay attention to what Percy was saying.

"But, like, _why_ do you say them? How do you know them?" Percy looked at her hesitantly, as if afraid she may get mad, and Annabeth felt a mixture of pride and hesitance - not to mention confusion from his question. It was good - she guessed - that she was seen as strong and powerful. She didn't like people questioning her. But was Percy still _that_ hesitant around her? They'd ended their first quest already, and yet the son of Poseidon was still somewhat unsure of her.

 _You can't exactly blame_ him _for that_ , Annabeth told herself. And, okay, _yes_ , she admitted that she was kinda rude to him when they first met, and a little stuck up too, but that didn't mean she wouldn't answer his question.

That didn't mean she didn't want to be his friend.

Percy stared at her with wide eyes, trying to read her. Annabeth ached to be able to do the same thing to him. She had always been able to read people. And yet, Percy was still a mystery. She knew he was loyal, and kind - sometimes too nice for his own good, and he was slightly dim-witted. At the same time, though, Percy somehow managed to notice things even _she_ missed - and Annabeth knew how angry he could get if his family, his friends (and now Annabeth realized she was part of that category, too, now) were threatened.

 _You've been silent too long_ , Annabeth worried as she watched Percy's eyebrows furrow - in a totally not cute manner, by the way.

"Go to Tartarus."

Annabeth couldn't help that she said it so matter-factly and so suddenly, but she wanted to at least say _something_. Percy's eyes widened, as she rushed on.

"That's an example of one, I mean," she added, flustered. "There's a lot of them - Holy Hera, What the Hades, Go to Tartarus, etcetera…" Annabeth trailed off.

"But how do you know them? Why doesn't everyone use the normal version?" Percy's brow was furrowed as it usually was when he was confused. Annabeth sighed.

"Maybe because we're _not_ normal, Seaweed Brain," she suggested sarcastically, and was relieved when Percy realized she was joking and grinned widely.

"I already knew _you_ were far from normal," he teased back, but she could see the hesitance in his eyes.

Annabeth smiled, smacking him on the shoulder. "Go to Tartarus," she said lightly, and she could feel her smile growing as Percy started laughing.

"Maybe I _will_ ," Percy said, sticking his nose in the air as he tried to suppress more laughs. "Who said I can't?"

Annabeth rolled her eyes. "Okay, first of all, do you even know what Tartarus is?" She smirked when Percy just looked at her. "My point exactly." He smiled. "Plus, I don't even know if you _can_ go to Tartarus. I know monsters go down there when they're killed, and there are mention in the myths, but it's probably not real."

Percy snorted as he pulled out his pen, _Anaklusmos_ , and started twirling it around in his fingers. Annabeth suppressed an eye roll when she saw it. Gods, Percy was so ADHD. "I thought the point of all of your Mythology lessons was that the myths _are_ real," he told her thoughtfully.

Annabeth fake gasped. "Gods, Percy, were you actually _listening_ to me?" She laughed when his cheeks flushed. It felt really good to laugh this much.

"Don't worry," he assured her. "I only listen to the part where you say ' _Percy, today we will be learning about_ …" he mimicked her in a high-pitched squeaky voice that made his voice crack. Annabeth scrunched up her nose.

"I don't sound like that!" she protested. He laughed.

"How do you know? Maybe your ears have some sort of filter that makes everything sound different?"

Annabeth grinned, and Percy was surprised. Had he really thought he could outsmart her? "But that means your voice sounds like that too!" She responded triumphantly.

Percy, though surprised, only responded in the high voice again, " _but that means your voice sounds like that too!_ "

Annabeth scowled half-heartedly. "You're so childish."

He only mimicked her again, " _You're so childish._ "

Hiding a smile, Annabeth's put on a dark expression, pretending to be angry. Percy's smile froze on his face. He got up quickly as she stood up, her eyes narrowed.

He watched with wide eyes as she unsheathed her knife lazily running her finger along the side. "I know I said only monsters could go to Tartarus," she said lightly. "But do you think I could send you to Tartarus if I killed you like a monster?"

Percy took this as his cue to run, and Annabeth raced after him, cackling madly.

It was the start of a beautiful, if odd, relationship.

* * *

Once Percy and Annabeth started dating, she tended to use the not-so-nice phrases less often. And not just with her boyfriend - everyone could see the difference in Annabeth. She was happier, more laid-back, and looser. Especially now that the Titan war was over, Annabeth was content. She still used the phrases, of course (almost all the older campers did), there was always a reason why she did it. Usually it was when she was exasperated with her work on rebuilding Mount Olympus, sometimes she would just be annoyed at Percy or one of her siblings, and often times she said to her enemies ( _ahem_ Clarisse _ahem_ ).

But then Percy was kidnapped by Hera.

Almost every other thing she said was something related to cursing the gods. Almost every time someone bothered her, she would feel the snappish phrase on the tip of her tongue. It took all of her will to not unleash her anger on everyone at camp.

But then, they found him. They were together again.

Piper, Jason, and Leo especially noticed the change in her attitude - they were the only ones who'd really seen her before and after they found Percy. Of course, Annabeth was just as dangerous, if not more dangerous now with Percy at her side, but the dullness in her eyes was gone. The bitterness in her voice had disappeared. The constant scowl on her face from before had settled into a relaxed, firm straight line (excluding the times when Percy was talking to her - then she would be constantly smiling, even if she tried to hide it).

But then she fell. And he fell with her. And together, they went to Tartarus.

Annabeth realized, as they fell together, clinging to each other like lifelines, that she could never, ever, possibly say that to anyone ever again.

It was too cruel. After what she'd experienced - what _they'd_ experienced - was too scarring and horrible to ever wish on someone else.

But habits are hard to break.

And one day, the common phrase popped up again.

Go To Tartarus was a common phrase. But after what Percy and Annabeth had gone through, it was quite a touchy subject.

It'd been months since the war of Gaea - everything was almost back to normal. As close as it could be to normal, anyway. And Percy and Annabeth, in their usual, normal way, were fighting.

"Why can't I come with you?" Percy was asking her angrily, throwing his hands up in the air. They were alone in Percy's Cabin, but their yelling was loud enough to alert the whole camp to their quarrel.

"It's not safe!" Annabeth snapped back.

"It's just as safe as me going with you!"

Annabeth sighed. "I'm going with my dad, Percy. You know how awkward it is with him. I want to try to make things better. But if you're there too…"

"He knows how hard it is for us. He wouldn't question me going with you," Percy said. Annabeth wouldn't meet his eyes.

"It's not safe," she repeated.

Percy threw his hands up in the air. "You keep repeating that, Wise Girl!" He suddenly took a step forward and grabbed his girlfriend's hands, forcing her to meet his eyes. "Tell me the real reason you don't want me to go to Boston with you."

Annabeth's grey eyes were hesitant, and she opened her mouth before closing it and then opening it again. "It's a family issue."

Percy dropped her hands, and she suddenly felt very vulnerable. He stared at her, his lips parted. "Annabeth, _what_ is going on? You keep saying it's a family thing, and I assumed you meant on your dad's side, but does this have something to do with the gods?" His eyes darkened at the thought. "If they put you up to something, you'd be safer with me. Stop lying to me. Stop avoiding me," he begged. "Just let me come, and -"

"Holy Hephaestus!" Annabeth said, exasperated. " _Stop pushing me!_ " She jabbed her finger in his face. All her emotions suddenly overcame her, no matter how she tried to push them back. This had become more and more often ever since Tartarus. "You don't understand!" It broke her heart when something snapped in Percy's eyes, but she wasn't going to cry.

Percy's eyes were confused, hurt, and angry. " _What_ don't I understand?"

Annabeth huffed angrily, absolutely done with all his questions. Why couldn't he understand that finding her cousin Magnus in Boston was a private thing? Why couldn't he understand that no matter how much she may want him to come, it would be too much?

"Annabeth. Say something." Percy looked at her angrily.

" _Go to Tartarus!_ "

Annabeth didn't realize what she said until after she said it. And when she realized, she put a hand in front of her face and took a step back in shock. Percy, too, was silent with surprise. There was no longer any anger between them. Only sadness, hesitance, and fear.

Neither of them had mentioned their trip to hell since they'd escaped. Neither of them had even uttered the word. But now, one of them had.

Annabeth could feel tears pricking the corners of her eyes, and she covered a sob with her palm. In one swift, fluid step, Percy was right in front of her, wrapping his arms around her securely. She buried her head in his arms as the tears started to flow.

"I'm so sorry," she muttered after a minute. It didn't take long for her tears to stop flowing and her shock to fade. Percy tightened his arms around her. He was silent.

"I didn't even realize…" she pulled away slightly, still looking down. Her words were so soft that Percy almost didn't hear them.

"I shouldn't have pushed you," he said after a minute. "I'm sorry."

Annabeth gave a soft chuckle as she wrapped her arms around her boyfriend and settled into his comfortable embrace. "I was being secretive. I shouldn't have."

"Why were you, then?" There wasn't anything accusatory in Percy's voice, just questioning.

Annabeth paused. "You know how I said it's a family thing?" He nodded. "It's my cousin Magnus. I think... he's gone missing," she said, trying to mask her pain with rushed words. "Well, he's been missing for awhile. But I guess I never really had time to worry about it. Now, there's… stuff... going on over there." Percy couldn't see her face, but he could just imagine her furrowing her brow and biting her lip as she contemplated. He smiled slightly as she continued.

"Magnus is different," she told her boyfriend carefully. "Even as a little girl, I knew that. That's one of the things we had in common." She pulled away to look him in the eye. "I'm not sure if he's a demigod, but if he somehow has a connection to the gods and doesn't know anything about it…" She didn't finish her sentence, but Percy knew what could happen. And even if he didn't know Annabeth's cousin, he didn't want her to get hurt, and he would never wish harm on another demigod like him.

"I don't understand why that means I can't come."

Annabeth sighed at her boyfriend's words, grabbing his tanned hands. Together, their calluses, and rough spots, and scrapes, and scars managed to fit together perfectly. She stared at their intertwined hands. "This is something I need to handle by myself," she said finally.

Percy squeezed her hands. "I don't want you to get hurt."

She smiled playfully - and weakly - at him, pleased he was letting it go so easily. She expected nothing less of her boyfriend. "Haven't you noticed that I'm usually in more danger around _you_?"

A spark of something - disappointment in himself, or her? - flashed in his eyes before he gave her a small grin. "I'm sorry if everyone - even the monsters - want to be around me, sweetheart," he teased lightly.

She swatted his arm. "I wouldn't take it as a compliment if _Kelli_ wants to spend time with you." She glanced up at him quickly, unsure if mentioning the empousa was okay yet. She knew he noticed it, but he let it pass quickly, flashing her a smirk.

"I wouldn't take it as a compliment that _you_ have the same taste as Kelli."

Annabeth rolled her eyes. "Who says I do?"

He pecked her on the lips softly. "I do," he told her breathily, sending a shiver down her spine. "But it's okay." He kissed her again, but this time longer. "I kinda like you too."

"Kinda?" Annabeth asked in mock hurt. She tried to make sure she breathed regularly as Percy started kissing her on her cheeks, nose, forehead, and mouth.

"Okay, okay," he relented, giving her one last, long kiss on the lips before pulling away and smiling at her cheekily. "Maybe I like you a lot."

"Well, I can top that," Annabeth said confidently, looking up to meet his eyes. "I _love_ you." Percy smiled, and then pursed his lips, as if thinking.

"Hmm… well, I think I love you too then."

They leaned in to kiss again, their smiles bright and eyes shining. A few seconds later, they broke apart, and Percy led her over to his bed, where they sat down on the covers. He brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes. They sat in silence for a minute.

Annabeth couldn't help it that her thoughts drifted back to what she had said earlier - those horrible, horrible words that now had a much bigger impact than ever before.

Percy knew what she was thinking - he usually did, after all. He squeezed her hand comfortingly. "Don't let it bother you, okay? I know you didn't mean it."

Annabeth chuckled darkly. "How'd you know what I was thinking?" But she knew exactly how her boyfriend knew her mind was starting to drift towards what she had told him earlier.

"I'm serious," he insisted. "It was an accident. And besides," he paused. "We're going to have to talk about it eventually. Chiron and everyone know enough from what Nico told, but I _know_ they want to hear what happened to us."

"I don't want to talk about it, Percy," Annabeth's voice was weak. "I don't even want to _think_ about it anymore." Her voice cracked as he wrapped an arm around her.

"We can't let it go unless we accept what happened to us," Percy told her softly. "And the first part of acceptance is talking about it to other people."

She jerked away from him, grabbing his pillow quickly and holding it tight up to her chest. "I don't want to tell them," she whispered. "I don't _want_ to be pitied, I don't _want_ to be looked down on, I don't _want_ to be avoided."

"You won't be," Percy promised. "They're our friends. And they already know how hard it was. They just want to know how to make it better."

"Percy, they _can't_ make it better," Annabeth explained in a hoarse voice. Percy frowned, unable to push away the feeling that 'they' included him. "They'll never understand."

The son of Poseidon sighed. He knew that he wouldn't be able to convince his girlfriend otherwise. "Well _I_ understand, Wise Girl. And I promise, I will do my best to make it all better."

Annabeth sighed and leaned into him, suddenly very, very tired. How was it possible that the topic of conversation had changed to quickly?

"Let's just wait awhile, okay? Before we tell them." Annabeth's voice was soft as she leaned on her boyfriend's chest. "I… I'll try to prepare."

Percy squeezed her gently, but said nothing. He just smiled.

"I'm sure you'll do a great job at preparing," he told her finally, kissing the top of her blonde head. "But before we think about telling other people, shouldn't we work on talking to each other about it?"

Annabeth bit her lip. "I know. I just… it's going to be hard, Perce."

Percy nodded. "We'll get through it. Together." His complete confidence in her, in _them_ , made her heart ache.

With a soft smile, Annabeth leaned her head on his shoulder, and responded,

"Together."

* * *

 **A/N: Uh hello? Is anyone still out there? I'll just leave this here lol**


End file.
